Body / Weight Obsession and Misery is Optional

In our culture there appears to be an understanding that a woman's value is determined by how thin she is. Being overweight is viewed as a sign of weakness, slovenliness and even low socio-economic level. Women's attempts to lose weight are fraught with an anxiety that often crosses over into panic. Feeling fat often makes a woman feel out of control. Going on the latest diet fad is calming and energizing at first because she feels she has a plan; she's back in control; she's trying to be a "better woman" and soon she will not only fit into lower sized clothes, but she will fit into society's idea of being acceptable. Inevitably after depriving herself of sufficient calories for days, she begins to notice her mood taking a nosedive as a gnawing anxiety begins to emerge. Her excitement and energy plummet as she finds herself fantasizing about forbidden food. She begins to make a case in her head why one little bite won't make a difference. After all, she's been so good; she deserves a teeny tiny little reward - just this once.

At this point the die have been cast. The wheels have been set in motion and off she rolls into a hazy altered state of compensatory bingeing. She has very little memory of this phase. She eats rapidly while she is emotionally and psychologically disconnected by staring off into space or more commonly distracting herself by watching TV, reading or driving the car. She doesn't "come to" until the deed has been done and all that she sees is the telltale evidence of crumbs, empty bags, and/or melted ice cream drips. Her recently shrunken stomach is crying out in agony as it once again stretches in response to this caloric onslaught. Here she is again, she yells at herself - weak, out of control and fat! She is so disappointed in herself. What is wrong with her? Everywhere she looks, she thinks she sees happy thin women smiling living the good life she could be living if only she weren't so fat, such a failure!

If you can relate to this phenomenon, there is an answer. It is about "waking up" to our habitual thoughts and behaviors in the present moment in an open-hearted accepting way so that we are able to free ourselves from these patterns that have kept us stuck on this not-so-merry-go-round that goes no where. Once we wake up, we will see that we have new choices. We no longer need to mindlessly repeat our old patterns that do not lead to happiness. As a matter of fact, when we wake up and become mindful there is a whole beautiful life to live that we have missed while we distracted ourselves in a food/body haze of negative thoughts and moods. Leading a mindful life not only creates a healthy relationship to food, enjoyment of and comfort with smaller portions of food, but also can open up the simple ability to enjoy and make the most of your life, your family, your relationships, your job in the moment no matter what the circumstances. What have you got to lose except excess weight, anxiety and depression?